You would never think that a little hug and a kiss in public would get you arrested. But in some parts of the world that public display of affection could put you in the slammer. I bet some people out there that cringe at PDAs would love to see that happen. Sex on the beach isn’t just a delicious drink, it’s a pretty delightful way to spend an afternoon. Even if it does get sand in all the wrong places. But did you know that in one part of the world it can come with a $90,000 fine. You’re better off just sticking with the drink I suppose. If you are a world traveler and want to stay up on all the rules, or you are like me and just want a good laugh. Then read the following 27 bizarre sex acts from around the world that will get you arrested.
1. In China women are prohibited from walking around hotel rooms in the nude. The only acceptable place for them to be nude is the bathroom. So no sleeping in your birthday suit ladies.
2. In Oxford, Ohio, it is illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a mans picture.
3. In Guam there are men that are paid to go around the countryside and sleep with virgins. It is an actual full-time job. This is because Guam’s state law prohibits virgins from getting married.
4. In Sweden it is illegal to be found buying the services of a prostitute. Even though prostitution is legal.
5. In Lebanon it is legal for men to have sex with animals. As long as those animals are female. If a man chooses to engage in sexual relations with a male animal, then he is committing a crime that carries a heavy price, bringing a punishment of death.
6. In Russia Vladimir Putin made it illegal to tell kids that gay people exist.
7. In Turkey it is mandatory that all men join the military. Gay men are not allowed to serve. However, if you are trying to get exempt you must provide photographic or video evidence that you are gay. And that evidence had to show you clearly performing a gay sexual act.
8. In Dubai you can not show any PDA. Any sort of public display of affection, even the slightest kiss on the cheek, can result in ten days of jail time for each person involved in the act. If you’re caught intoxicated while being affectionate in public, you could face up to a year in prison.
9. In Uruguay a man can legally kill his cheating wife. If a man is caught cheating with another man’s wife, then it is totally within the scorned husband’s legal rights to kill both of the adulterers. If murder is too severe, then the jilted husband can always choose option B, which would be to castrate the man and cut off the woman’s nose. All perfectly legal.
10. In Estonia’s capital, sex requires your undivided attention. A quick game of chess while copulating is forbidden. I can’t say a playing a game of chess has ever crossed my mind while having sex.
11. Better to drink a sex on the beach in Spain than have it. Sex on the beach is illegal. Spain takes couples having sex on the beach very seriously, and though there is no violence involved in the punishment, the guilty parties can face fines as high as $90,000 U.S.
12. In Texas you are allowed to own six dildos. A drawer full of any more could get you a Class A Misdemeanor, resulting in a fine of up to $4,000 and/or a jail term of up to one year.
13. In Flint, Michigan you better pull your pants up. Low riding pants showing your undies will get you a sentence of 93 days and a $500 fine. Pull em up people!
14. In Sweden taking full-frontal pics in a photo booth is a cardinal sin in Sweden. Being topless is perfectly okay though.
15. In California it is illegal for either partner to reach climax before the other during foreplay. Is this an argument against foreplay?
16. In Budapest, sex is only allowed in the dark. Even in your home, with your wife. You have to wonder why this one was created.
17. If you are in Little Rock, Arkansas keep those pickup lines to yourself. No matter how suave you consider yourself they are prohibited in public and may put you behind bars for 30 days.
18. In Virginia adultery is a Class 4 Misdemeanor, which could earn you a maximum fine of $250. Plus it’s not a very nice thing to do.
19. In Louisiana Necrophilia is legal!! Knock yourself out… get it?
20. Doctors Can’t Look Directly At Females’ Genitals in Bahrain, they can only look at them using a mirror. While a male doctor may legally perform examinations on a female and legally examine a female’s genitals, a male doctor is not legally allowed to actually look directly at the female patient’s genitals during a physical exam. In order to still be able to perform his duties as a doctor, the doctor is only able to view a female patient’s private area through a reflection in a mirror.
21. In Colombia a woman’s mother must be present when she consummates her marriage. Hello awkwardness. It has been reported via numerous sources that in the city of Cali in Colombia, a woman may have sex, but the only man she may have sex with is her husband. Furthermore, and here’s the weird part, the first time the newlywed couple engage in consummating their marriage, the woman’s mother must be in the room and be a witness to the act.
22. In Bolivia having sexual relations with a mother and a daughter simultaneously is prohibited. There go a few guys hopes and dreams.
23. In Hong Kong a wife is legally allowed to kill a cheating husband, but only with her bare hands. Her husbands lover however can be killed in any manner desired.
24. The penalty in Indonesia for masturbation is decapitation. Off with their heads!
25. In Liverpool, England topless saleswomen are allowed in stores that sell tropical fish. While topless saleswomen are illegal to employ in almost every business venture in England and in almost every city in England, in Liverpool, topless saleswomen are actually legal to employ. But only in stores that sell tropical fish. So if you want to see some boobies, go buy some tropical fish.
26. In Oregon, talking dirty while having sex is illegal. Even though they don’t really specify what qualifies as dirty talk.
27. In Massachusetts it is deemed illegal for a woman to be on top during sex. But come on, what man is going to turn her in?
Some of these laws are pretty ancient, and some are not so ancient. Some get enforced, and some not so much. I for one would take no chances. Some of those fines are pretty hefty. Plus no one wants to say they went to jail and did hard time and then when asked what for having a response like, oh I had sex with the lights on in Budapest.
So, how many “crimes” listed here are you guilty of?